“Me Too.”

A number of weeks ago you may have seen this phrase pop up on your Facebook or Twitter feed. It popped up on my Facebook, and I shared it. As I, too, have been a victim of harassment and abuse. I’m grateful I haven’t been raped. My heart is shredded for all who’ve gone through that violent experience.

0eac9f97-eedb-47a7-acd0-145c9bee6859

I wanted to write a blog post at the time, but other things came up and forced the subject from my focus. And I was kind of glad to not have to deal with it. I mean, it’s an ugly situation, but then if we don’t speak up, we give tacit approval for the meanness to continue.

I remembered that Alyssa Milano wasn’t the person who originated the phrase, “Me too.” She’d put it up on Facebook. The woman’s name escaped me, so I did a quick on-line search.  The woman, Tarana Burke, and her story can be found on this website.

http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/17/us/me-too-tarana-burke-origin-trnd/index.html

The Twitter and Facebook campaign has been amazing. This is from the article:

The company (Facebook) said that in less than 24 hours, 4.7 million people around the world have engaged in the “Me too” conversation, with more than 12 million posts, comments and reactions. According to Facebook, more than 45% of people in the United States are friends with someone who’s posted a message with the words ‘Me too.’

I like to think maybe we’re almost at a turning point, but that may be optimistic of me. But it seems the outrage at these behaviors is growing. Surely, we’re getting close to a critical mass. A point at which men (or women) who harass others will feel the wrath of public opinion and the law so much that they will decide perhaps they need to change their behavior.

Real men don’t harass, denigrate, or make fun of women. Real men, don’t make fun of anyone. We want to be with people who bring us up, not knock us down.

People who haven’t experienced harassment are quick to ask, “Why don’t these people come forward right away?” Perhaps if you’ve never been in the minority, never been looked at as “different,” never been addressed as if you didn’t have a clue and weren’t worthy for others to listen to your ideas, perhaps you can’t understand.

Please, let those of us who have experienced reactions like that assure you that you begin to believe the lie that you’re unworthy. You begin to believe there is something wrong with you and you really deserve the treatment. That belief makes you stay quiet. And the worry about whether you’ll be believed. How often have you heard, “Well, she just wants the attention.” Or “Well, dressing like that, she was asking for it.”

Everyone who comes forward to testify to this ugly behavior deserves our thanks, because it’s only when light is shined on actions that we can find justice.

4e0f3472-8055-4601-aadb-c7ca43b3fc8d

Thanks for listening. Be kind to each other. I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Newsletter http://eepurl.com/bBcimz , marsha@marsharwest.com  http://www.marsharwest.com 

https://authormarsharwest.wordpress.com/ Blog

https://www.facebook.com/marsha.r.west 

http://www.twitter.com/Marsharwest  @Marsharwest

https://www.pinterest.com/marsharwest/

https://sisterhoodofsuspense.com/blog

7 responses to ““Me Too.”

    • Hey, Vicki. Yeah, I don’t tell details either. Sorry you had to leave a job you loved. There should be other options. So often that’s not the case. Thanks for sharing and stopping by. 🙂

      Like

  1. The #metoo campaign (for lack of a better word), made me revisit an incident from many years ago, and tell the story to a couple of people close to me. I told them of my experience and the fear that followed me for a long time. This was an incident I hadn’t thought about for many, many years, yet sharing the words felt good.

    But the crazy flip side was thinking back over all the men I have worked with/for in my various careers, what incredibly vulnerable positions I was often in, and how wonderful it is that except for that one rotten s.o.b., they all treated me with respect–even one with a bad “womanizer” reputation!

    I’m very glad #metoo has happened. And very grateful for the open dialogue.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hey, Kathryn. Yes, I hadn’t thought in years about the various experiences until this campaign got underway. You just go on and live busy lives. I’m so glad you added about all the “good guys,” because there’re are plenty of those out there. It’s just that what the bad guys do, stays with us forever. Thanks so much for stopping by. 🙂

      Like

  2. I didn’t do the Me,Too on FB or Twitter, but yes, Me, Too. Very often in the 70’s & 80’s, not really at all after I started working for the school district. I learned how to handle jerks. Too bad you just don’t have that kind of experience and confidence when you’re 21.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hey, Julie. I think you’re right. As we get older and more secure in who we are and our value and worth, it’s easier to say back off. That’s not appropriate. At 20 or 21, much harder to do. Thanks for stopping by. 🙂

      Like

  3. Just seeing this; thank you for writing it. Romance became very important to me in my twenties because of the guaranteed HEA. For years I avoided books, films, anything that might trigger the memory of what happened to me at 22. I didn’t call it what it was, even to myself, for 12 years. I blamed myself for “bad judgment” because I’d trusted someone who didn’t deserve that trust. I told no one until I was 34.

    For many of us, acknowledging the thing aloud and having the person we tell believe us, whether it’s been an hour or a decade or fifty years, is critical. That, and the full, internal realization that it was not our fault. That it was *never* our fault.

    Like

Leave a Reply to tammara webber Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s